The Ben Feldman Show

Show #63 on August 24, 2010

admin — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 11:44:42 +0000

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Intern Loo and Richard Kiss back in the studio.

Crappy Twappy keyword was “tiger” due to the official divorce of Tiger Woods and all the tweeting about it.

We play Mad Libs with the Antoine Dodson Bed Intruder song.

The team discusses

Tree activists are gathering around trees and crying.
Christian rap sucks, especially Christ-Like Cruisin.
A man tried to kill a psychic in Russia who tells him he’s going to end up in jail in the future. He kills two witnesses and ends up in jail.
A man hires two hookers to unknowingly hang and kill him.
Restaurant chain Wendy’s had some entertaining musical training videos back in the eighties. Among them, one for making hot drinks, and one for cold drinks.
Some people are protesting the mosque plan in New York City.
A 100 kilometer traffic jam in China enters it’s 9th day.

Comedian Nicole Turley joins us for the second half and tells us some stuff. She once was engaged to an illegal alien from Mexico.

“Best of” clips from the Ben Feldman Show

admin — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 10:30:31 +0000

Unfamiliar with the show? Check out these “best of” clips and tell me they aren’t worth listening to somewhat…

1. Starbucks Stickler (from show #62 – 7:04)
Old uptight lady causes a fuss at a New York Starbucks over nothing and we talk about it.

2. Ben’s birth (from show #45 – 2:44)
Ben pretends to remember how he felt when he learned where babies come from.

3. All in the family (from show #51 – 3:41)
Candrew (Candy and boyfriend Andy) recount their flight back from Las Vegas.

4. AOL search terms (from show #6 – 15:53)
Search terms leaked onto the web reveal some crazy user motives.

5. Candy’s Old Man (from show #4 – 24:43)
A call from Candy’s old man from our early days. Don’t worry, Ben’s anger is feigned.

6. All the single ladies (from show #51 – 4:42)
Liza Minnelli sings All the Single Ladies.

7. Shitty Twitty Michelle Obama (from show #35 – 6:22)
A good example of Shitty Twitty (now called Crappy Twappy), a segment we do with current events and Twitter.

8. Sweet Gail (from show #62 – 20:55)
Crazy “comedian” Sweet Gail has been calling us recently.

Show #62 on August 17, 2010

admin — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 12:05:04 +0000

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Intern Loo is back for more scat humor, and Richard Kiss joins us again as color commentarian.

Crappy Twappy keyword was “mosque” due to the controversy over building a mosque near ground zero in New York City.

Ben recounts his encounter with a stuttering local comedian.

The team discusses

An annoying old lady gets booted from Starbucks for being a grammar Nazi.
How to relieve a cat in heat.
An Obama donator wants her money back.
A 75 year old woman needs to squeeze between two obese passengers on a flight.
Ben Feldman All-Star Will Ratblood had a band he never told us about.
A terrible Asian singer from New Zealand doesn’t know she’s terrible.
More covers of the Antoine Dodson bed intruder song – A Cappella, alt rock, and Japanese lute.
An old commercial for fake cocaine to trick ladies with.

Crazy lady Sweet Gail calls in to try and tell us about her American Idol adventures and god knows what else.

Comedian Dr. Brian King joins us again to tell us about his plans for a one man show, and gives us his take on the movie Inception.

Show #61 on August 10, 2010

admin — Thu, 12 Aug 2010 09:02:59 +0000

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New intern Loo joins us. She’s Chinese and looks like a news anchor woman. She questions Ben about the allure of scatological humor.

Richard is back from Las Vegas for a while and joins us as color commentarian.

Crappy Twappy keyword was “dodson” due to internet sensation Antoine Dodson’s quick rise to fame. He’s the guy who acted all funny on a TV news interview when he was talking about his sister’s attempted rape, and some guys put it to music via auto-tune.

Crazy lady Sweet Gail calls in to remind us how crazy she is.

The team discusses

Antoine Dodson has a t-shirt line and ringtone available on iTunes.
A woman wipes a dirty diaper on another woman’s car in an act of road rage.
A Pop-Tarts store opens up in New York’s Times Square.
What makes a fart, why they smell the way they do, etc.

Comedians Kevin Kevino and Joey Hughes join us for the second podcast. We talk about their lives a bunch.

Show #60 on August 3, 2010

admin — Thu, 05 Aug 2010 12:56:39 +0000

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Just Bandy in the studio again today for the first part.

No Crappy Twappy but fake guests were Rip Torn, the Puddle on Ben’s Floor After His Dishwasher Flooded, and our listener’s collective terms of endearment.

The team discusses

The brilliant rant of Antoine Dodson to the local news after he helped save his sister from being raped by an intruder in their home, and the even more brilliant auto-tuning of that rant.
A young fat gay man sings Ke$ha’s “Tik Tok”. The question remains whether he really acts like that or is putting on a character.
Britain’s David Attenborough shows us how the amazing Lyre bird can imitate a chainsaw, among other things.
The ladies of the View discuss Elisabeth Hasselbeck’s theory that older women who’s husbands leave them for younger women often become lesbians because they can’t find a man.
Lady Gaga touts abstinence to protect her own creativity. She says that having sex might make her lose her creativity through her vagina.
Jamba Juice makes a phony ad for a Cheeseburger Chill smoothie.
Hugh Hefner has sex twice a week. A Playboy Playmate describes how his orgies function. Hugh claims that his magazine does not turn women into sex objects because they already are sex objects.
You can get cosmetic surgery that gives you dimples.

Young comedian Joey Bragg (now 14) joins us once again. He and Candy play “Are You Smarter Than An 8th Grader”. They also play a fair version of Name That Tune. Joey’s dad flirts with women in the cafe.

Show #59 on July 27, 2010

admin — Thu, 05 Aug 2010 12:39:34 +0000

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Just Bandy in the studio today for the first part.

Crappy Twappy keyword was “Gibson” because he’s all up in the news with his telephone rant.

The team discusses

Actor Morgan Freeman will be marrying his step-granddaughter.
A crazy man is running for governor of Tennessee and gets to make his pitch on the local news.
A limited edition beer sold out for $765 per bottle. Only 12 were produced. The beer was 55 proof and it’s bottle comes wrapped in actual roadkill.
A finger in someone’s butt crack sparks a knife fight.
A show Battle Of the Bods is entertainingly horrible.
Mel Gibson was dumped by his agent.
A text message to Mel Gibson by his girlfriend may prove she was trying to extort money from him.
A fan of Sex And The City slept with 1,000 men in 10 years.
A man shoots his wife with toilet paper.
There are many humorous requests for jerk off sessions on Craigslist.
A woman working at a store while it is being robbed gets turned on by the perp. She puts an ad on Craigslist to find him.
Tourists can purchase a vacation package in which they get to experience what it’s like to be kidnapped.

Comedians Adrian Palenchar and Chris Burns join us for some entertaining banter and then they go completely silent once Ben gets controversial (even though he wasn’t really being that controversial).

Show #58 on July 20, 2010

admin — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 07:17:11 +0000

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Just Bandy in the studio today.

Crappy Twappy keyword was “Lohan” since she is going to jail.

Fake guests were Shelley Winters, the Cumberland River and our listener’s collective favorite pasta dishes.

The team discusses

Walls of fat to be removed from London sewers.
Daughter exiled by hateful family and Westboro Baptist Church.
Tea Party signs you won’t see on TV.
Mel Gibson’s tirade caught on tape.
Things to make with your placenta.
Teens are getting high with digital drugs.
More songs that sound alike.

Candy’s old man calls in to talk about hot rods and stuff as Ben ignores him and goes off on a Beatles tangent.

No show on July 13, 2010

admin — Mon, 19 Jul 2010 00:03:27 +0000

Sorry folks, although we did the show live, the podcast didn’t record AGAIN (not our fault!). Urgh.

Show #57 on July 6, 2010

admin — Mon, 12 Jul 2010 07:42:35 +0000

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Richard Kiss joins us as color commentarian.

The team discusses

An interview with a female urologist.
Cigarettes hit $14.50 a pack with new tax in NYC.
Sexy Russian spy Anna Chapman’s husband releases her nude photos.
Price proclaims that “the internet is completely over“.
New Jamaican danze craze “daggering” is breaking penises left and right.
Betty Anne Waters becomes a lawyer to free her innocent brother from jail, which ends with a sad twist.
A prison inmate smuggles a video camera inside a prison and films for 6 months. The footage will be aired in a documentary on HBO.
A woman uses Craigslist to give away her neighbor’s annoying trailer.
A commercial for Huggies Jeans Diapers.
A woman won more that a million dollars in the Texas lottery for the 4th time.
A Jewish student was caught painting swastikas on her own door.

Show #56 on June 29, 2010

admin — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 05:24:46 +0000

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Fake guests include Timothy Hutton, the Gulf of Mexico, and our listeners’ collective moods.

Richard Kiss joins us as color commentarian.

Shitty Twitty keyword is “chris brown” because he’s the guy who beat up Rhianna and then a few years later cried on the BET awards during his Michael Jackson tribute and now people are arguing over whether the tears were fake and whether he has redeemed himself (wtf?????).

We play “Obama or Lil Jon” game.

The team discusses

The Michael Jordan twitter account we’ve been enjoying is fake and has been suspended.
The California Legislature is considering a bill that would allow the state to begin researching the use of electronic license plates for vehicles.
An 86-year-old woman threatens police and gets tasered.
An instructional video for country hip-hop dancing.
The trailor for a new freaky movie called Dogtooth.
A Toronto man has a melt-down when the mall closes.
An idiot on Youtube claims that soccer is bringing socialism to America.
A crazy old man rants about pork rinds.

13 year-old comedian Joey Bragg joins us in the studio but won’t let his father join us because he overtakes conversations. His father still participates through the window. Then his mother calls in.